Our Portfolio

A new threat to our kids

Tuesday, July 27th, 2010

OK, well not ‘our’ kids. I don’t have any kids. Your kids. Your teenage kids. Do you really know what they are up to in their bedrooms, when they’re sitting in front of the computer late at night? Well, best thing you could do is sneak up to the doors of their rooms and then barge in unannounced because there is a good possibility that they may be iDosing.

iDosing is a new craze that is sweeping across the world and makes use of a technique known as binaural beats. The system plays one frequency in one ear and another frequency in the other. The idea is that this then modifies the brain waves of the user to make them high. Yes, you heard me – high on digital drugs.

Just to prove that I am not making this up, here is a link to the article the Daily Mail have written on the subject: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1296282/I-dosing-How-teenagers-getting-digitally-high-music-download-internet.html

Now while it has been speculated by highly reputable sources that the people doing this are just been overly suggestible and stupid, and other studies have shown that there is no effect on the brainwaves at all, this advice should be ignored. The best advice can only be lock up your kids and for goodness sake keep them away from any music devices.

BP wants Your Mother

Wednesday, June 16th, 2010

It seems BP urgently require the assistance of your mother to block the oil leak, as she is the only one large enough to do so successfully.

Exotic Matter is a Promotional Solution

Thursday, May 27th, 2010

…which means it is used to promote something, namely Antimatter Design.

Antimatter Design’s 2010 Portfolio can be viewed online at antimatterdesign.com/portfolio.pdf. If you seem like the type of person likely to give me a bit of freelance work, I could even send you a hard copy, if you ask nicely.

Trouble in Paradise?

Monday, April 26th, 2010

Here at Exotic Matter, we appreciate the intrinsic humour of relationships in trouble, so we produced this piece of work for Relate, which they did not use:

Screw you if you don’t like this

Thursday, February 11th, 2010

Sir Fred Goodwin’s new workout DVD

Thursday, February 4th, 2010

Following the financial crisis that wiped out the jobs of hundreds of thousands of people, left legions more completely skint and is expected to lead to enormous cutbacks in public spending, it transpired that top level bankers were to blame. After crawling to the government to get bailed out, some of the heads of these banks went on their merry way, pockets filled with millions of pounds of money that had originally belonged to people who are now struggling to make ends meet.

One of these bankers was Fred ‘the Shred’ Goodwin, who has now been offered a job as a financial fitness advisor to architectural firm RMJM.

Exotic Matter 21st Century Advertising Solutions were delighted to produce the cover for Sir Fred’s upcoming DVD – why get ripped when you can get shredded?

For all you bargain hunters out there

Wednesday, February 3rd, 2010

featuring photography by Ilker Igdeli (http://provakat.deviantart.com/)